the unreadable and the unbelievable

to ALL who sent their blessings, prayers, well wishes, and angels yesterday, a BIG THANK YOU.

It was one of the toughest interviews I've ever had to go for in my short life, but I can say that I kept my cool, and appeared confident and composed (though i was freaking out inside)

just to give all of you some idea of what went on .....

3.50pm - i attempt to drive to the embassy and end up in 8 nassim road, home of DIANE .. drive straight up the meandering driveway and speak to a delivery man who points out politely that this is NOT the Japanese Embassy... I continue on a 'tour of the house grounds because the driveway so so narrow i couldn't do a 3 point turn until i reached the entrance of the house itself

3.55pm - i attempt to drive into One of the Two Gates of the Jap Embassy. and, as expected, I'm told to drive in and park via the Other gate. of course the silly thing is that they make me walk out of the embassy and walk into the other side via the gate that i was turned away from..... :!

4pm - i get my visitors pass, and m asked to sit in a holding area so small that i feel uncomfortable because the nice security guard is standing quite close to me and this rather large metal detector. all the walls are marble. and i inch nearer the window that looks out into the porch that has a garden.....

4.10pm - i meet the other MOE guy who also successfully passes the first round with the Staff Training Branch Bigshots. He doesn't look too happy... and wishes me 'goodluck' and when i asked him how his interview went, he replies with a rather vague, "the interview was quite tough", before leaving in silence.

before i continue, let me give u a low down on this guy: regular overoverover achiever, super 'ontheball' and confident type. ie the type you do not expect to screw up an interview.... alarm bells start ringing in my head.

4.10-4.15pm - nice lady Tina says,"you can go up now" and leads me straight to an interview room on the second floor of the embassy. en route to the room, i see a comfortable reading area and nice red lounging couches on the first floor and wonder, "why didn't they just let me in".... at the same time, experience some shock that the interviews were shorter than expected (usually MOE interviews take place 10mins after your scheduled time - and my scheduled time was 4.30!)

4.15pm - eternity
1st qns asked: what is ur name?
(feel like a doltz for not introducing myself when i greeted them)

2nd qns: pls explain your (proposed) masters thesis topic.
(heart sinks a bit because i havent' even looked at the topic since i wrote it! ie. i can't remember what on earth i wrote!)
(tries to explain about my interest in non-coercive education and my new insight - which i did not have when i was writing the proposal - about linking non-coercive educational methods back to the system of assessment that governs Education)
(overall, i felt this part was answered the worst.. cause i did not have a freaking idea of what specifically i wanted to research you see.... tsk)

3rd qns: please tell us when you got this idea for your thesis.
(first thought was to answer, "5 days before the embassy's submission deadline" *hahah*, but then reflected further and realised it was because of my stupid dog. so i say, "about 2 years ago when i started trying to understand the principles of positive reinforcement in dog training" - dont' ask me why i said 2 years, it should have been 1.5yrs. but it didn't strike me until after... )
(*interviewer raises eyebrows*)
(i panic abit but remain calm and attempt to link the principles to dog training to motivating students in a classroom)
(feel bad vibes emanating)
(interviewer comments that that is a very interesting way in which a thesis is conceived)

4th qns: if you feed a dog too much the dog gets fat...... (leaves me to conjecture his meaning)
(i kinda knew this might be coming ... i mention about the fact that positive reinforcement training, and in fact, all forms of motivational approaches cannot be ends in themselves because they need to eventually instill a joy in the product - which could be as simple as a command, 'sit' or the joy in learning. ie. eventually, stickers, prizes, money and gifts work towards instilling a love of learning that comes from intrinsic motivation rather than external factors.)

5th qns: there are some pple who do not believe in non-coercive, and soem pple who do believe in this
("i completely understand that fact")

6th qns: singaporean students do very well because the environment is very competitive. what is your opinion about competition?
(competition is necc for growth and progress. however, we need be careful about whether competitiveness stems from a sense of drive and motivation for success, or it is artificially created and imposed on all students. the latter type of competition results in good grades, but also creates a student population who are unsure of what they are passionate about or driven by. so competition is necessary but we need to be careful of the sort of competitiveness we promote)

7th qns: you said in your proposal that you are going to interview both teachers and students from public and private schools in japan. You understand that you will need to conduct your interviews in Japanese? and your command of Japanese will not be too good. what are you comments on this?
(i simply state that my command of the language will never be as good as the locals, because its not possible to gain advanced knowledge of language in 7mths. however, i also mention that communication does not only require words but also is imbued in non-verbal understanding)
(she seems to be somewhat satisfied with this answer)

8th qns: why japan?
(this was a toughie. i mentioned my 3 days stay at fukuoka with japanese friends who were speaking in english, and added that it would be nice if i could go back and speak in japanese to them. that would be a good exchange! also mentioned the fact that this was a once in a lifetime opportunity since u rarely get a chance to learn a different language apart from english AND get chance to study in that country... also mentioned about the benefits of regional exchange, since this is called, 'Asian Youth Fellowship Programme')

9th qns: what are your plans after you finish your masters? PHD?
(basically i said i'd want to come back to singapore to share with students and teachers about my experience, as well as try out the 'theories' proposed in a real classroom. and if that is successful, i'd consider furthering research via phd.)

10th qns:how did you find out about this scholarship?
(my answer was blunt. by accident when i walked past a notice board in my school, i found an incomplete copy of the application on the board and filled it in) - at this stage, all interviewers snigger / show disbelief at the ridiculous hand of fate that led to my completion of the application.

thank you.
END OF INTERVIEW.

hahaha. i tried my best. i really did. and if i don't get it, i have no regrets. i m really not sure if i'll get it, because their faces were blank. unreadable, no inscription, no nothing.

results in april